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If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.

Dorothy Parker

Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death God
Maybe it is only I, but conditions are such these days, that if you use studiously correct grammar, people suspect you of homosexual tendencies.
DOROTHY PARKER

Identity Literature Study Yourself
There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
DOROTHY PARKER

Distance Hell Simplicity Sports Truth Word
If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.
DOROTHY PARKER

End Surprise Woman
You do what you can, and you do it because you should. But all you can do is all you can do.
DOROTHY PARKER

Action Responsibility Yourself
This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn’t touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
DOROTHY PARKER

Fools Myself Sorry Touch
By the time you swear you’re his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this — One of you is lying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death Lying Marriage Passion Promise Time Yourself
I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it’s so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Easy Love People Sweet Yourself
Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
DOROTHY PARKER

Change Funny Life Myself Oneself Sex Story
He is a writer for the ages, the ages of four to eight.
DOROTHY PARKER

Age Children Forever Himself Time Writing
Oh, seek, my love, your newer way; I’ll not be left in sorrow. So long as I have yesterday, Go take your damned tomorrow!
DOROTHY PARKER

Future Love Past Seek Sorrow
Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.
DOROTHY PARKER

Appreciate Audience Goodness Intelligence Myself Praise Talk
The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
DOROTHY PARKER

Cheating Hollywood Reality
I’m not a writer with a drinking problem, I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
DOROTHY PARKER

Character Drink Identity Myself Problem Writing
That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Language No Talk Woman
Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death God

If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.

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If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Dorothy Parker Quotes