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I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.

Dave Chappelle

Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Function Smoking Substance Yourself
Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Interest Place World Yourself
You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Old People Right Yourself
I’m happier in the way a guy gets happier when he starts to mature. It doesn’t make things easier, but I’m so much better at handling them.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Better Happiness Mature Myself Start
The mark of greatness is when everything before you is obsolete, and everything after you bears your mark.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Greatness Mark Yourself
I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Country God Hope Land Myself Swear
Everyone around me says, You’re a genius! You’re great! That’s your voice! But I’m not sure if they’re right.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Genius Myself Right Voice
I started when I was 14. I figured out that’s what I wanted to do when I was 14. Even when I was six, I can remember people telling me, “You’re gonna be a comedian,” and all this stuff.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Myself People Remember Start
When I’m on stage, I get real happy there. Maybe that’s the only time in my adult life I feel like myself.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Happiness Life Myself Reality Time
Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Field One Liner Orientation
My wife asked me once if I weren’t a comedian, what I would do. I couldn’t answer the question. I never imagined doing anything else.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Imagination Myself Question Wife
I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Black Man Myself Thinking
My father told me ‘Name your price in the beginning. If it ever gets more expensive than the price you name, get out of there.’
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Beginning Expensive Myself Name Price
I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Change Count Day Future Myself People
I always take a relationship to the next level. If that works out, I take it to the next level after that, until I finally reach that level when it becomes absolutely necessary for me to leave.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Leaving Level Myself Necessary Relationship Work
The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Angry Himself Mindset People Position

I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.

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I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.

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Popular Authors

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