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Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.

Dave Chappelle

I get a little heated when I talk about the past. But I wanted to be clear – I’m not mad at anybody – not anymore.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Angry Mad Myself Past Talk
There’s something about doing stand-up that’s cathartic.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Feeling Stand
My wife asked me once if I weren’t a comedian, what I would do. I couldn’t answer the question. I never imagined doing anything else.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Imagination Myself Question Wife
They do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Commercial Difference Listening Money Myself Pay Taste
Once you been performing on the streets you can conquer any venue.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Conquer Performance Street Venue
I have angst in my life, but I’m like anybody. We all have angst in our lives that we pick up and fidget with and then we put down and look at some other things that make us feel good or enjoy our lives.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Enjoyment Feeling Goodness Life Live Ourselves
You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Old People Right Yourself
Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Himself Religious Scripture Sin Smoking
The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive. “I don’t understand this person. So they’re crazy.” That’s bullshit. These people are not crazy. They strong people. Maybe their environment is a little sick.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Call Crazy People Strong Worst
Money is the fuel for choices. Money gives me choices, so it’s not nothing, it’s something. But it’s not the end all, be all. There are other things in my life that I did not purchase with money that are very valuable.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Choice End Life Money Myself Purchase Value
Comedians by and large are some of the most sensitive people on earth. Even if they’re socially callous.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Earth People Sensitive Social
Constantly take inventory of what’s important to you.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Important Invention Yourself
All white people talk about when they get high is other times that they got high.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

People White
I just like seeing people. I just like meeting people. I like finding out new walks of life and new ideas.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Ideas Life Myself People Walk
I got a lot of positive people around me.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Myself People Positive
I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Change Count Day Future Myself People
I enjoy my own thoughts sometimes.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Enjoyment Myself Thinking Time
I don’t normally talk about my religion publicly because I don’t want people to associate me and my flaws with this beautiful thing. And I believe it is beautiful religion if you learn it the right way.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Association Learning People Religion Talk Yourself
I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Country God Hope Land Myself Swear
When I’m on stage, I get real happy there. Maybe that’s the only time in my adult life I feel like myself.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Happiness Life Myself Reality Time
I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Black Man Myself Thinking
My father told me ‘Name your price in the beginning. If it ever gets more expensive than the price you name, get out of there.’
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Beginning Expensive Myself Name Price
Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Interest Place World Yourself
The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Angry Himself Mindset People Position
The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Call Crazy Label Name
Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Function Smoking Substance Yourself
It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Enough Famous Hollywood Myself White

Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.

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Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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