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I’m a Communist by day and a Catholic as soon as it gets dark.

Brendan Behan

It is a good deed to forget a poor joke
BRENDAN BEHAN

Deeds Forget Poor
That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Humor Mother
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
I ruined my health drinking to other people’s.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinking People Ruined
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison
When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Fighting Men Two Woman
Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Judging Said Umpires
New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Funny Irish People Spiritual
I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It’d depend whose life.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Capital Crime Imagine Punishment
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
I’m a Communist by day and a Catholic as soon as it gets dark.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Catholic Communist Dark
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World
Ninety-seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Saint Theatre Two Years

I’m a Communist by day and a Catholic as soon as it gets dark.

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I’m a Communist by day and a Catholic as soon as it gets dark.

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Popular Authors

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