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When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.

Brendan Behan

There’s no one, no one, loves you like yourself.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Like Love One Love You
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide
That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Humor Mother
What the hell difference does it make, left or right? There were good men lost on both sides.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Differences History Men
Every cripple has his own way of walking.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cripples Walking Way
You made one mistake. You married me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cynical Married Mistake
I ruined my health drinking to other people’s.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinking People Ruined
A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles … it takes your mind off the cost of living.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cost General Living Mind War
There’s no bad publicity except an obituary.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Bad Obituary Publicity
Most horror movies are certainly that.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cinema Horror Most
One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Addiction Country Enough Irish People
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World
If you accept your limitations you go beyond them.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Accepting Country Irish Limitation People
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinkers Problem Writing
I saw a notice that said “Drink Canada Dry” and I’ve just started.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Drinking Food
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
Ninety-seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Saint Theatre Two Years
God forgive us-but most of us grew up to be the sort of men our mothers warned us against.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Family Forgive Men Mother
It is a good deed to forget a poor joke
BRENDAN BEHAN

Deeds Forget Poor
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
In a society which really supported marriage the wife would be encouraged to go to the office and make love to her husband on the company’s time and with its blessing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Blessing Husband Marriage
Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Inspirational Irish People Psychosis
Failure at a task may be the result of having tackled it at the wrong time.
BRENDAN BEHAN

May Results Tasks
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison

When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.

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When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.

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