And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.
BO BURNHAMDo unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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I’m a stand up comic and I always sit and slouch, and I got my girlfriend pregnant on my sterile uncles pull-out couch.
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At the time of ‘Words, Words, Words,’ I’m a 19-year-old getting up feeling like he’s entitled to do comedy and tell you what he thinks of the world, so that’s inherently a little bit ridiculous.
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I thought I wanted to be a physicist in high school until I learned that there was much more math than philosophy in it. I assumed I would just sit around all day and think.
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I don’t like calling myself a “feminist” only because I don’t think I’ve done anything active enough to call myself one. It’d be like calling myself a civil rights activist just because I’m not racist.
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Love is all about… whistles.
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Women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don’t.
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If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn’t respect that.
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The world doesn’t need any more hot chicks or tough guys or smooth talkers – the world needs more you. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
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Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.
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How old is too old to stop believing in, like, the tooth fairy? Like 12? I’ve got a cousin who is 18… Yeah, still believes in gay marriage.
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I never said I was funny, OK, so stop staring at me.
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I’m bored way too easily. I’m staring at screens half the day. I need to be overstimulated. And how will that express itself artistically?
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I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.
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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.
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Poverty. Racism. Isn’t it strange, only the homeless are begging for change?
BO BURNHAM






