For fifteen cents a day you can feed an African, they eat pennies.
BO BURNHAMBitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.
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I don’t try to call myself a poet. But I know that my stuff is pretty literal, in that the themes are pretty simple and on the surface.
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I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
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I’m friends with a lot of comedians, but we don’t talk about material. Most comedians I know don’t watch a lot of other comedy.
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I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
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Twitter is a lot like crystal meth, because it’s really fun to do and Oprah’s on it.
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The biggest danger, for me, with making yourself your act is that a lot of people with think they know you for better or worse. That’s an ongoing struggle with me and it can get really trippy sometimes.
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I’m actually very open to having a conversation about what I should or shouldn’t say.
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What’s that? My six song album entitled Bo Fo Sho is currently available on iTunes? With three songs that have never been heard on the internet? Uh, and if I try to pirate it for free I’ll get AIDS? I would have guessed scurvy. Well, see you later ghost of Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.
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Women are like fingers and toes because they’re easy to count on.
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Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.
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Laughter is the best medicine, y’know, besides medicine.
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The thing is, I was on YouTube like the golden era, I think. Before ads came in, it was really cool back then.
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Because I see that as a crutch sometimes and I want to know that I can do something funny and worthwhile without that. And also make a show that my parents would like and that kids could watch with their parents.
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When life gets you down, make a comforter!
BO BURNHAM