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I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost… my virginity.

Bo Burnham

$Bo Burnham Quote - I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don’t have a great ear. It’s like a tragedy – I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.$

I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don’t have a great ear. It’s like a tragedy – I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.
BO BURNHAM

Ability Math Music People Pretty
If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?
BO BURNHAM

Jesus Land Water
Poverty. Racism. Isn’t it strange, only the homeless are begging for change?
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor Poverty Racism
I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Gay Humor Jesus
The thing is, I was on YouTube like the golden era, I think. Before ads came in, it was really cool back then.
BO BURNHAM

Eras Golden Thinking
I’m a stand up comic and I always sit and slouch, and I got my girlfriend pregnant on my sterile uncles pull-out couch.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Girlfriend Uncle
I don’t try to call myself a poet. But I know that my stuff is pretty literal, in that the themes are pretty simple and on the surface.
BO BURNHAM

Simple Stuff Trying
People give me money and I don’t know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy.
BO BURNHAM

Geneticist Giving People Real
I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, ‘Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast.
BO BURNHAM

Cereal Men Remember Thinking
Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor Theory
Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.
BO BURNHAM

Fake Kings Talent
What’s that? My six song album entitled Bo Fo Sho is currently available on iTunes? With three songs that have never been heard on the internet? Uh, and if I try to pirate it for free I’ll get AIDS? I would have guessed scurvy. Well, see you later ghost of Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.
BO BURNHAM

Internet Kings Pirate Song Try
Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
BO BURNHAM

Bitches Country Feminist Hoe Knows People
I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
BO BURNHAM

Donkey Funny Giants Humor
I just try to do things on stage that I think the audience would enjoy. And I try to draw on and add to acts that I’ve enjoyed watching.
BO BURNHAM

Add Thinking Trying
There’s a certain line between jokes and music and poetry that’s a bit blurred in my mind.
BO BURNHAM

Certain Joke Lines Mind Poetry

I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost… my virginity.

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I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost… my virginity.

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Popular Authors

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