Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
BO BURNHAMWomen are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don’t.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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What’s that? My six song album entitled Bo Fo Sho is currently available on iTunes? With three songs that have never been heard on the internet? Uh, and if I try to pirate it for free I’ll get AIDS? I would have guessed scurvy. Well, see you later ghost of Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.
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Where are all the sour patch parents?
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I’m actually very open to having a conversation about what I should or shouldn’t say.
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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If comedy is about surprises, about tension, there’s a lot of tension and surprise there, in the fact that people are expecting this to be natural.
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There’s a certain line between jokes and music and poetry that’s a bit blurred in my mind.
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“Do I really want to make a joke about a miscarriage when a woman in the audience might have had one?” I don’t worship comedy; at the end of the day I don’t fall to the altar of comedy unquestioningly.
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I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, ‘Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast.
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I never felt like I was stealing anyone’s fans as much as I was introducing some younger people to comedy who will eventually find tons of other comedians that they love.
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You love the people that give you money and attention? Of course you do, that’s not selfless that you love your fans, that’s ridiculous.
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My persona on stage was always coming from a place of I know better than you and I’m going to be a little bit pretentious in your face with these sort of crass ideas.
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In the distance, Bo saw a fairy. A fairy so beautiful that he felt proud of being called one in highschool.
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I’m friends with a lot of comedians, but we don’t talk about material. Most comedians I know don’t watch a lot of other comedy.
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I don’t like calling myself a “feminist” only because I don’t think I’ve done anything active enough to call myself one. It’d be like calling myself a civil rights activist just because I’m not racist.
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Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.
BO BURNHAM







