The thing is, I was on YouTube like the golden era, I think. Before ads came in, it was really cool back then.
BO BURNHAMWas Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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There’s a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her. How long til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he’s a good conductor?
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I’m happy with what I’m doing. I try not to focus on how I’ve changed. I just try to focus on what I’m doing now.
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The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.
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I’m not a grown up until everybody realises I’m a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.
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I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
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If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?
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I know it’s the comedian’s instinct to say, “Do it, man, nothing’s off-limits! It’s cool, bro!” I don’t know if that’s the answer for me.
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Twitter is a lot like crystal meth, because it’s really fun to do and Oprah’s on it.
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How old is too old to stop believing in, like, the tooth fairy? Like 12? I’ve got a cousin who is 18… Yeah, still believes in gay marriage.
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People do complain about the way I act on stage… They think on stage I act too arrogant, too self-obsessed, solecistic, self-contained, synonyms.
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I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.
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Laughter is the best medicine, y’know, besides medicine.
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I don’t need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.
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I’m bored way too easily. I’m staring at screens half the day. I need to be overstimulated. And how will that express itself artistically?
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Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.
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I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
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Do you guys like impressions? “Why?” That was Socrates.
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Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
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If comedy is about surprises, about tension, there’s a lot of tension and surprise there, in the fact that people are expecting this to be natural.
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“Do I really want to make a joke about a miscarriage when a woman in the audience might have had one?” I don’t worship comedy; at the end of the day I don’t fall to the altar of comedy unquestioningly.
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Drugs kill, just like cancer. So don’t smoke… tumors.
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I do think that stand-up comedy in general heavily favors masculinity and so I like to act a little feminine onstage.
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My persona is most importantly just to communicate the material in a way that is most funny and meaningful in the moment. It’s more like a character that’s sculpted for whatever joke needs communicating at the moment.
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I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost… my virginity.
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Comedy is the one absolutely self-aware art form. Actually, hip-hop’s another one, I suppose. Because in your songs you’re talking about how good a hip-hop artist you are. It’s like a painter painting a panting of himself painting a painting.
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Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.
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