I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I… don’t.
BO BURNHAMWas Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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Squaring numbers are just like women. If they’re under thirteen, just do them in your head.
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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.
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I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
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It’s not most important to communicate myself on stage as it is to be as funny or interesting as I possibly can on stage.
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For fifteen cents a day you can feed an African, they eat pennies.
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I do think that stand-up comedy in general heavily favors masculinity and so I like to act a little feminine onstage.
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In the distance, Bo saw a fairy. A fairy so beautiful that he felt proud of being called one in highschool.
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I thought I wanted to be a physicist in high school until I learned that there was much more math than philosophy in it. I assumed I would just sit around all day and think.
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.
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I’m actually very open to having a conversation about what I should or shouldn’t say.
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I think comedy has a range, with multiple peaks in different areas. It’s like trying to compare Beethoven and the Beatles. Sometimes I hear from people, ‘I think you try too hard in your comedy.’ And that’s what I worry about.
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We’re having a traditional Thanksgiving – turkey, mashed potatoes, hat buckles, smallpox, genocide, a blue corn moon, etc.
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If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I’d still say no.
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You love the people that give you money and attention? Of course you do, that’s not selfless that you love your fans, that’s ridiculous.
BO BURNHAM