Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
BILLY CRYSTALWomen need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
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Nothing can take the sting out of the world’s economic problems like watching millionaires present each other with golden statues.
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Did you ever reach a point in your life, where you say to yourself, ‘This is the best I’m ever going to look, the best I’m ever going to feel, the best I’m ever going to do,’ and it ain’t that great?
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I never stopped believing in us and I never felt like I was wanting for anything, except for my father, and that was not going to be. I describe in the book [that] I don’t think I ever felt young again in that way.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I’d always go off book and start improvising.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
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I’m comfortable being old… being black… being Jewish.
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You give up your dream, you give up.
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I used to limp around my neighborhood imitating him. I did my Bar Mitzvah with an Oklahoma drawl.
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I’m a sucker for a free tuxedo.
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Well, the way things are going, aside from wheat and auto parts, America’s biggest export is now the Oscar.
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At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.
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When comedy is good, it’s jazz. The beats of it, the looseness, the improvisational part, the music-the way you hit the inflection, the high notes of a joke. It’s all melody to me.
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I was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
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I’m going to go on just living and laughing and loving.
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