I decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
BILLY CONNOLLYI am totally, absolutely romantic. When I broke up with a girl I would listen to the most heart-breaking music and make it worse. That’s what girls do. I think I am a girl really.
More Billy Connolly Quotes
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When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, “Has the bus come yet?”. If the bus came would I be standing here?
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Acting is a different discipline. On stage I’m free to say what I please. But the change is very good for ya.
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I’d never consciously left home to see a zombie movie. They were fine by me, but I had no intention of ever being in one. But I’ve been learning more about it as I’ve been doing interviews. I
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I think of my life as a series of moments and I’ve found that the great moments often don’t have too much to them.
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Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.
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If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?
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Killing a guy and stealing his wife and child isn’t too nice a thing to do.
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A well-balanced person has a drink in each hand.
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I’m a huge film star… but you have to hurry to the movies, because I usually die in the first 15 f–ing minutes. I’m the only guy I know who died in a f–ing Muppet movie.
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I think age is terribly overrated. You’re okay as long as you don’t grow up. By all means grow old, but don’t mature. Remain childlike, retain wonder, the ability to be flabbergasted by something.
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A fart is just your arse applauding.
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Don’t work out, work in.
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Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you’ve blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that… wrll, it’s because the national anthem is boring.
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There’s a fine line you have to tread because you don’t know who is out there in the auditorium. A lot of people are too easily offended.
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Learn to feel sorry for music because, although it is the international language, it has no swear words.
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