People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that’s an image I really didn’t need.
BILLY CONNOLLYI’m not going to throw away the hand of friendship to suit 100 Trotskyites in Glasgow.
More Billy Connolly Quotes
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A mate of mine has just told me he’s shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said “her brothers got a moustache!”
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Outgrew the media… The negativity felt like a disease.
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For me, it’s about the desire to win. My audience becomes a crowd of wild animals and I have to be the lion-tamer or be eaten.
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Life is supposed to be fun. It’s not a job or occupation. We’re here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh.
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Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.
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I decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
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I was brought up a Catholic, for that you get an A level in guilt.
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I became a welder. I was actually becoming an Engineer and I joined the wrong queue. And so I became a welder, without knowing what a welder was.
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There’s nothing better than a fight, especially when you’re watching it from a safe place. You can yell encouragement! Hit him with the left, he’s a big Jessie!
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I still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it’s not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more these days.
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Killing a guy and stealing his wife and child isn’t too nice a thing to do.
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Without arts programmes there’s only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.
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Never run with scissors or other pointy objects.
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I am totally, absolutely romantic. When I broke up with a girl I would listen to the most heart-breaking music and make it worse. That’s what girls do. I think I am a girl really.
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There’s no such thing as bad weather – only the wrong clothes.
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