If your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.
BILL WATTERSONWhen birds burp, it must taste like bugs.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.
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Problems often look overwhelming at first. The secret is to break problems into small, manageable chunks. If you deal with those, you’re done before you know it.
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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.
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You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing. Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk. Hobbes: You’re ignorant, but at least you act on it.
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God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
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Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world’s problems?
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As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever.
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Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
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County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that’s the problem.
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The whole idea of hobknobbing and schmoozing and the concept of an “elite” class of celebrities better than the common people has always made my stomach turn.
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I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh track.
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It’s gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, “Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy.”
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You have the Swiss Army Knife of mental tools, and it’s going to come in handy all the time.
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Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
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Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. I love loopholes.
BILL WATTERSON