Every time I’ve built character, I’ve regretted it.
BILL WATTERSONWhy waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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If people looked at the stars each night, they’d live a lot differently. When you look into infinity, you realize that there are more important things than what people do all day.
BILL WATTERSON -
What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!
BILL WATTERSON -
You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!
BILL WATTERSON -
Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
BILL WATTERSON -
If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.
BILL WATTERSON -
One of the jokes I really like is that the fantasies are drawn more realistically than reality, since that says a lot about what’s going on in Calvin’s head.
BILL WATTERSON -
As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever.
BILL WATTERSON -
Even when you look for it, you’re never prepared for it.
BILL WATTERSON -
I’m killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.
BILL WATTERSON -
My whole problem is that my lips move when I think.
BILL WATTERSON -
Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.
BILL WATTERSON -
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.
BILL WATTERSON -
So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?
BILL WATTERSON -
No sport is less organized than Calvinball.
BILL WATTERSON -
That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.
BILL WATTERSON







