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Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

Bill Watterson

As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever.
BILL WATTERSON

Congratulations Forever Long
You can drag my body to school but my spirit refuses to go.
BILL WATTERSON

Body School Spirit
And it will be even more exciting if anyone pays for them. It’s hard to charge admission without a gate.
BILL WATTERSON

Admission Anyone Exciting Gate More
You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure. The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive.
BILL WATTERSON

Failure Headed Resources Success Truth
I’ll bet my autopsy reveals my mouth is too big.
BILL WATTERSON

Autopsy Bigs Mouths People
Reality continues to ruin my life.
BILL WATTERSON

Funny Inspirational Life
Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
BILL WATTERSON

Command Information Thorough Useless
I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Point Stories Thinking
You have the Swiss Army Knife of mental tools, and it’s going to come in handy all the time.
BILL WATTERSON

Army Handy Knife Swiss Time
But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He’s one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!
BILL WATTERSON

Demand Kind Sacrifice
Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I came from Sears? Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart – almost as good and a lot cheaper!
BILL WATTERSON

Assembly Baby Cheaper Dad Light Sears
I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?
BILL WATTERSON

Allowed Hello Rattle Say Stop Swear Words
Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery – it recharges by running.
BILL WATTERSON

Car Mind Running
They can’t chain my spirit! My spirit runs free! Walls can’t contain it! Laws can’t restrain it! Authority has no power over it!
BILL WATTERSON

Law Lawn Over Running Spirit Wall
If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.
BILL WATTERSON

Butter Control Funny Life Peanut
With each decision, we tell ourselves and the world who we are. Think about what you want out of this life, and recognize that there are many kinds of success.
BILL WATTERSON

Decision Kind Ourselves Recognize

Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

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Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

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Popular Authors

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