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Surgeon General’s warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.

Bill Hicks

Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you.
BILL HICKS

Drug Funny Humor
How come people always flip and think they’re Jesus? Why not Buddha? Particularly in America, where more people resemble Buddha than Jesus. ‘Ah’m BUDDHA!’ ‘You’re Bubba!’ ‘Ah’m Buddha now..All I gotta do is change 3 letters on ma belt.
BILL HICKS

Country Jesus Thinking
We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
BILL HICKS

Growing Ideas Revolutionary Thumbs
I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.
BILL HICKS

Happiness Ideas Laughter Revolutionary
I don’t like anything in the mainstream and they don’t like me.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Ideas Revolutionary
Pornography is any act that has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts…Sounds like almost every commercial on TV to me.
BILL HICKS

Artistic Causes Commercial Sound
You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial? I’m not thinking of gum. I am thinking of chewing, so maybe that’s the connection they’re trying to make.
BILL HICKS

Connection Make Trying
What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn’t it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It’s gonna be worth it!.
BILL HICKS

Boys Light Lightbulb Sun
I don’t identify with anyone historically, but there are several people in the future who I am a dead ringer for.
BILL HICKS

Future Historically People Several
The Voice of Reason is in us all…and everyone can recognize it because it makes sense and everyone benefits from it equally.
BILL HICKS

Benefits Reason Voice
You ever seen somebody do that? I’ve seen someone do that. Let me tell you something – if you’re smoking out of a hole in your neck [mimics it again] I’d think about quitting. And that’s just me, ya know.
BILL HICKS

Big Fear Quitting Smoke Something Think
In the beginning God created the heavans and the earth… see you at the final.
BILL HICKS

Earth Finals Heaven
I’ve had good times on drugs…bad times on drugs…But I’ve had good and bad relationships…and I’m not giving up pussy.
BILL HICKS

Bad Drug Giving Relationship Up
I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, ‘My dad can beat up your dad.’ I’d say ‘Yeah? When?’
BILL HICKS

Dad Funny Motivational
People always snap and think they’re Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they’re Buddha?
BILL HICKS

Jesus People Thinking
I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night.
BILL HICKS

Eight Night Sleep

Surgeon General’s warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.

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Surgeon General’s warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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