Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
AMBROSE BIERCEDemocracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.
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