Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
AMBROSE BIERCEWomen of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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