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I mean, I hate to gloat, but I’m extremely satisfied with my position in life and the way things have worked out for me.

Al Yankovic

I dated Siamese twins, I slept with Big Foot, too. Get me on Sally Jesse, put me on Donahue.
AL YANKOVIC

Big Date Foot Put Sally Siamese Slept Too Twin
As a wise man once said, “April Fools Day is for amateurs. You NEVER need an excuse to mess with people’s heads.”
AL YANKOVIC

April Day Excuse Fool Man never People Wise
You make me wanna staple bagels to my face, then remove them with a pitchfork.
AL YANKOVIC

Bagel Face Pitchfork Remove Staple Wanna
He died a long painful death. However, you’ll be happy to hear that just a few years later he was reincarnated as Shirley MacLaine.
AL YANKOVIC

Better Death Little Long Look Nerdy People Year
What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist’s performance on whether or not they had a good seat?
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Attention Austin Kind More Music
I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.
AL YANKOVIC

Esteem Hockey Little Lost Made Self Team
I did have a child, and I was reading a lot of picture books to her, but at the same time writing a children’s book was something that I’d been wanting to do for many years, pretty much since the start of my career.
AL YANKOVIC

Book Career Child Picture Pretty Raed Same Time Want Year
I’m an ugly girl, My face makes you hurl, Sad I have it, I should bag it. Acne everywhere, Unwanted facial hair. I’m a relation to Frankenstein’s creation.
AL YANKOVIC

Acne Bag Everywhere Facial Girl Hair Make Ugly Unwanted
Some songs are too repetitive for me to be able to fashion a humorous set of lyrics around. Some songs flat-out just don’t work creatively for me.
AL YANKOVIC

Around Creatively Humorous Lyric Repetitive Some Song
I don’t think there are any new media I’d like to cover.
AL YANKOVIC

Any Cover Media New Think
Some people want to advertise their weirdness, and spread it out, that’s not me.
AL YANKOVIC

Advertise Out People Want Some Spread Weird
It doesn’t take a military genius to see we’ll all be crispy critters after World War III.
AL YANKOVIC

Critter Genius Look Military Peace School Second War World
I think that was the genesis of my polka medleys, because every rock song I played on the accordion just sounded like a polka and my friends thought it was funny.
AL YANKOVIC

Friend Funny Genesis Medley Polka Rock Song Soun Think
My hobbies just sort of gradually became my vocation.
AL YANKOVIC

Gradually Hobby Sort Vocation
You fake something until you’re good at it.
AL YANKOVIC

Fake Good Something Until
About four or five months ago, at a dinner in New York, John made the very nice offer of my being guest editor for an issue of MAD and I thought about it for about half a nanosecond and decided that was a pretty good idea.
AL YANKOVIC

Editor Five Good Guest Idea Issue Month Nanosecond Nice Offer Pretty

I mean, I hate to gloat, but I’m extremely satisfied with my position in life and the way things have worked out for me.

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I mean, I hate to gloat, but I’m extremely satisfied with my position in life and the way things have worked out for me.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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