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Oh, no, you’re kidding.’ I go, ‘No, I’m really honest.’

Al Franken

When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both.
AL FRANKEN

Advice Comedy Contradict Encounter Good Seemingly
I ask the American people not to fall victim to disinformation. There are no death panels. The Affordable Care Act cuts the deficit.
AL FRANKEN

Country Cut Death Disinformation Fall No Panel People Victim
The point is that there is tremendous hypocrisy among the Christian right. And I think that Christian voters should start looking at global warming and extreme poverty as a religious issue that speaks to the culture of life.
AL FRANKEN

Among Christian Hypocrisy Point Religious Right Think Tremendous
The news movement conservatives that are just laying out, slathering out the disinformation and the lies, as I discuss in my book, ‘Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.’
AL FRANKEN

Balance Book Conservative Discuss Disinformation Fair Just Lay Lie Like Look Movement News Out Slather
I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like me.
AL FRANKEN

Dog Enough Gone Like People Small Smart
Some of George W. Bush’s friends say that Bush believes God called him to be president during these times of trial.
AL FRANKEN

Believe Call College During Friend God Popular President Some Time Trial Vote
During the Reagan Administration, Bob Dole was present at a ceremony that included each living ex-president.
AL FRANKEN

Administration Bob Ceremony Country During Each Evil Include Live Present President
There is a subset of Democrats who tend to mis-fill out ballots. The way you mark the ballot is like an S.A.T. – you fill in the circle. And the subset of people who tend to, like, put a check there instead, or an X, or fill it out wrong.
AL FRANKEN

Afraid Ballot Check Circle Mis-fill Our People Subset Tend Voter Wrong
I don’t consider myself an artist necessarily, but craftsmen or people in the arts, their spiritualism is sort of when you’re writing well or performing well or doing whatever you do well.
AL FRANKEN

Art Artist Consider Craftsmen Myself Necessarily People Perform Sort Writing
There is – I mean – I found early in life that righteous indignation is a little off-putting, and so I try to couch it with humor.
AL FRANKEN

Coach Early Found Humor Indignation Little Mean Pulling Righteous Try
And I think that being able to make people laugh and write a book that’s funny makes the information go down a lot easier and it makes it a lot more fun to read, easier to understand, and often stronger. So there’s all kinds of advantages to it.
AL FRANKEN

Book Down Easy Fun Information Laugh Make People Think Understand Write
There’s going to have to be investigations, and an independent investigation, into the Trump campaign and the Trump administration’s relationship to Russia.
AL FRANKEN

Administration Campaign Country Independent Investigation Relationship
Let’s keep the Internet weird. Let’s keep the Internet free.
AL FRANKEN

Free Internet Keep Let Weird
I’m crushed by the responsibility of writing a satirical book.
AL FRANKEN

Book Crush Responsibility Satirical Write
You can’t change your fingerprints. You have only ten of them. And you leave them on everything you touch; they are definitely not a secret.
AL FRANKEN

Change Definite Everything Fingerprint Leave Secret Touch
But when Americans lack the most basic information about our domestic surveillance programs, they have no way of knowing whether we’re getting that balance right. This lack of transparency is a big problem.
AL FRANKEN

Big Country Domestic Get Information Lack Problem Program Surveillance Transparency

Oh, no, you’re kidding.’ I go, ‘No, I’m really honest.’

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Oh, no, you’re kidding.’ I go, ‘No, I’m really honest.’

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