When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both.
AL FRANKENDoes the mainstream media have a liberal bias? On a couple of things, maybe.
More Al Franken Quotes
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The nature of the Internet and the importance of net neutrality is that innovation can come from everyone.
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People who have severe mental illness are in Hell. People who have lost a loved one are in Hell.
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But God told me that He/She/It had actually chosen Al Gore by making sure that Gore won the popular vote and, God thought, the Electoral College. ‘That worked for everyone else,’ God said.
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I don’t consider myself an artist necessarily, but craftsmen or people in the arts, their spiritualism is sort of when you’re writing well or performing well or doing whatever you do well.
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I’ve been a producer and led people. Also, being a comedian, you’re under pressure.
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I’m the New York Jew who actually grew up in Minnesota.
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And I think that being able to make people laugh and write a book that’s funny makes the information go down a lot easier and it makes it a lot more fun to read, easier to understand, and often stronger. So there’s all kinds of advantages to it.
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I anticipate that Apple’s fingerprint reader will in fact make iPhone 5S owners more likely to secure their smartphones.
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Asking the question whether the mainstream media has a liberal or conservative bias is like asking whether al Qaeda uses too much oil in their hummus.
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I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.
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I feel a deep obligation to the men and women who have risked life and limb on our behalf.
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Anyone with an Internet connection and a few dollars can obtain personal information they should never have access to, including a user’s date of birth, e-mail address, or estimated income.
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We need an investigation, because we don’t know what Donald Trump owes Russia.
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Google’s screen for privacy settings does give you more options for what you share than Apple’s does. But it’s not a complete list, and people aren’t aware of whether or not that information will go to a third party.
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You might not like that Facebook shares your political opinions with Politico, but are you really going to delete all the photos, all the posts, all the connections – the presence you’ve spent years establishing on the world’s dominant social network?
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The only job they had, which is to give accurate, objective ratings to financial products.
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I do have a self-censor; everybody does, or at least most who are not pathological do.
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He [Newt Gingrich] is the most unpopular politician in America. His favorable rating is only four points higher than the Unabomber.
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I also focus on Bush and his administration – who do a lot of lying – and how a right-wing media has allowed them to get away with a lot of stuff that, in a different media environment, they probably wouldn’t be able to get away with.
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I once asked the most fabulous couple I know, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, how they kept things fresh despite having been married for almost seven months. ‘It’s a job, Al,’ Guy told me. ‘We work at it every day.’
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By best, I mean when I have a real sense of doing the right thing and doing good for people and the connected universe of everybody.
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If 98 out of 100 doctors tell me I’ve got a problem, I should take their advice.
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The Republican agenda is a radical vision in which Medicaid is slashed to the bone – in which we start to balance the budget on the backs of, literally, our most vulnerable citizens.
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Humor and seriousness are not in opposition to each other.
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My dad always told me to stand up to bullies, and Bill O’Reilly is kind of a bully, and he’s the kind of kid who hits other kids on the playground.
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My parents were really political. The news was very important in our home.
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