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Bill Clinton is the greatest president of the 20th century because I played touch football with him.

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The civil rights movement was very important in my house, and then Vietnam was very important ’cause there were two boys, so I came of age during a very heated political climate.
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They talked about unreasonable searches and seizures, about keeping the government out of their bedrooms.
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I don’t know what happens to you after you die. I’m not banking on there being, like, a heaven.
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I’m part of the mushball middle. I consider ‘confused’ the majority position because, thankfully.
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that is eventually going to have an effect on soldiers and troops who are actually going to believe that and it’s wrong. It’s just wrong.
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I don’t know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can’t see it.
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The nature of the Internet and the importance of net neutrality is that innovation can come from everyone.
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Well, I think that there’s a value to comedy in and of itself.
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During Vietnam, I was in college, enjoying my student deferment. The government wisely felt that, in my case, military service was less important than completing my studies to prepare me for my chosen career: comedian.
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I do personal attacks only on people who specialize in personal attacks.
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I think the government has a role in protecting the fundamental rights of its citizens.
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If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it’d be a travesty.
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There’s going to have to be investigations, and an independent investigation, into the Trump campaign and the Trump administration’s relationship to Russia.
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Apple has long been a leading innovator of mobile technology; I myself own an iPhone.
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They’re trying to pay for health care and send their kids to college, they’re worried about declining home values, they’re scared for a loved one they have serving in Iraq.
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A blogger should have the same ability to find an audience as a media conglomerate.
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