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I love Toronto. I love it. I love Toronto. I love Canada. I can’t wait to get back. Can’t wait to have some Timbits.

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Back Country Some Toronto Wait Waiting

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But I love stand-up, and it’s where I came from creatively, so it’s something I never want to walk away from.
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Away Creativity Something Stand Up Walk Want
I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.
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Dating Divorce Favorite Game Girlfriend Now Play Real Right Tinder
You just have to keep getting up’. And I look back and they were right. They were all right.
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Maybe the nails are a little stubby and gnawed on, but I definitely do not have man hands.
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Definitely Gnawed Hand Man Maybe Nail Stubby
I’ve always been a gamer, and I had a period where I was gaming at a really hardcore level.
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Always Game Gamer Hardcore Level Period
I talk to grown-ups who are out to have a good time and they want to be spoken to in a different way.
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Different Good Grown Spoken Time Trying Up Want Way
Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.
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I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.
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I visualize myself winning the Olympic Pentathlon, inventing a phone that can be controlled by brain waves, or doing the laundry.
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Control Doing Inventing Lying Myself Olympic Phone Visualize Wave Win Winning
They always say some women like to fix people. I don’t like to fix people, but you like a challenge.
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I think I was only attracted to drunken douches before I got married.
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Whereas regular people tend to run away – because the embarrassing story is always going to be the really funny story.
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I really do know football.
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Do Football Know Really
Sometimes the mistake I see people make is thinking that they’re always going to be up, and I think that’s impossible for anyone.
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You know, it’s about getting out there and having a good time. Not about worrying .
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Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.
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Again Bucket Drool Fave Heard Rivulet Running Toddler Wall Watery

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