“Karaoke is the great equalizer.”

I want to point out, that this is not my fault that everyone’s afraid of me, because I did not kill a couple people the other day.

I don’t want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.

Omnipresence can be a good or bad thing, I suppose. I don’t want to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I’m super-grateful.

I don’t want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.

Nothing really worth having is easy to get. The hard-fought battles, the goals won with sacrifice, are the ones that matter.

I don’t believe in superheroes but I love Batman movies. There’s a part of every person that is entertained by the idealistic, the fantastic.

Sometimes the mistake I see people make is thinking that they’re always going to be up, and I think that’s impossible for anyone.

I’m sure I had low-level scurvy all of my childhood.

You know, it’s about getting out there and having a good time. Not about worrying .

I was raised by a single dad, so I’ve always just kind of liked “guys” stuff. I think my dad just took me to the things he was interested in.

I actually wanted to be an attorney. I did do things on the side like improv and sketch comedy, but law was my focus. I was a very bookish, academic kid. When I got out of college,

I’m just myself, so I don’t know that I think of myself as a nerd icon.

My parents were vegetarians. I’d show up at school, this giant black kid, with none of the cool clothes and a tofu sandwich and celery sticks.

I’m my own boss and my boss is a total ass.

I take the most wrenchingly painful moments of my life, brush them off and present them for the amusement of others. Luckily for me, my childhood was torture.

I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.

I find it so funny that for the first time in history, people have access to this great equalizer in the Internet, which grants everyone the same knowledge base.