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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

Joseph Heller

In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
JOSEPH HELLER

Accident Failure Predict
I’m not running away from my responsibilities. I’m running to them. There’s nothing negative about running away to save my life.
JOSEPH HELLER

Life Negative Responsiblity Run Save
When I look up, I see people cashing in. I don’t see heaven or saints or angels. I see people cashing in on every decent impulse and every human tragedy.
JOSEPH HELLER

Angel Decent Heaven Human Impulse Poeple Saint Tragedy
You’re an intelligent person of great moral character who has taken a very courageous stand. I’m an intelligent person with no moral character at all, so I’m in an ideal position to appreciate it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Appreciation Character Courage Intelligence Moral
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it’s going your way. When it isn’t, don’t call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
JOSEPH HELLER

Acceptance Bad Luck Destiny Injustice
The enemy is anybody who’s going to get you killed, no matter which side he is on.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enemy Kill War
Be glad you’re even alive. Be furious you’re going to die.
JOSEPH HELLER

Alive Death Die Furious Life
Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deep Mad Medal Men Reward
From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
JOSEPH HELLER

Goodness History Moral Teaching
What do you do when it rains?” The captain answered frankly. “I get wet.
JOSEPH HELLER

Rain Wet
Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
JOSEPH HELLER

Air Exercise Fresh Meet Opportunity People Prostitution Trouble
You know, that might be the answer – to act boastfully about something we ought to be ashamed of. That’s a trick that never seems to fail.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ashame Failure Trick
It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.
JOSEPH HELLER

Dead Difference War Win
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
JOSEPH HELLER

Achievement Born Medicore Mediocrity Men Sarcastic Thrust
He knew everything there was to know about literature, except how to enjoy it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enjoyment Except Literature
I don’t believe in miracles because it’s been a long time since we’ve had any.
JOSEPH HELLER

Broken Heart Miracle Time

It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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Popular Authors

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