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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

Joseph Heller

In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
JOSEPH HELLER

Accident Failure Predict
But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.
JOSEPH HELLER

Children Favor Influence Liberation Parents War
Mankind is resilient: the atrocities that horrified us a week ago become acceptable tomorrow.
JOSEPH HELLER

Acceptance Mankind Resilence Tomorrow
Remember that everyone deserves some fun during working hours.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deserve Fun Leadership Work
Well, he died. You don’t get any older than that.
JOSEPH HELLER

Broken Heart Die Old
Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deep Mad Medal Men Reward
The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren’t paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ignorance Law Mind Nature Paranoid Promote
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it’s going your way. When it isn’t, don’t call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
JOSEPH HELLER

Acceptance Bad Luck Destiny Injustice
Never quit a job as a matter of principle. You’ll always regret it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Job Principle Quit Regret
When I grow up I want to be a little boy.
JOSEPH HELLER

Boy Grow Up Little
While none of the work we do is very important, it is important that we do a great deal of it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deal Greatness Important Work
What do you do when it rains?” The captain answered frankly. “I get wet.
JOSEPH HELLER

Rain Wet
He was never without misery, and never without hope.
JOSEPH HELLER

Hope Misery
All of my books deal in a very rough, rude fashion with subjects about which there are great conflicts of opinion.
JOSEPH HELLER

Book Conflict Deal Fashion Opinion Rude Subject
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
JOSEPH HELLER

Achievement Born Medicore Mediocrity Men Sarcastic Thrust
Frankly, I’d like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
JOSEPH HELLER

Government Industry Private Togetherness

It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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It doesn’t make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who’s dead.

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Popular Authors

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