black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I’m not into those kind of rivalries. I remember standing out in front of Stratford, minding my own business. Carload of about eighty kids would pull up.

Bill Hicks

What before seemed a…frustrating wall, the comic deftly and fearlessly steps through, proving the absurdity of it all.
BILL HICKS

Comic Steps Wall
This Bud’s for yooouuuu.” C’mon, everybody, let’s be hypocritical bastards. It’s okay to drink your drug. We meant those other drugs. Those untaxed drugs. Those are the ones that are bad for you.
BILL HICKS

Bad Drug Everybody Hypocritical Okay One
I’ve been on what I call my UFO Tour, which means, like UFOs, I too have been appearing in small southern towns in front of a handful of hillbillies lately.
BILL HICKS

Flying Southern Towns
We are losing the ‘War on Drugs,’ which means there’s a war going on and people on drugs are winning it.
BILL HICKS

Drugs Mean War Winning
We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
BILL HICKS

Everything Funny Humor Life
We are one with God and He loves us. Now if that isn’t a hazard to this country-How’re we gonna keep building nuclear weapons?
BILL HICKS

Country Hazard Nuclear
Speaking of Satan, I was watching Rush Limbaugh the other day.
BILL HICKS

Rushing Satan Speaking Watch
I ascribe to Mark Twain’s theory that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most. The one who should be picked is the one who should be dragged kicking and screaming into the White House.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Ideas Revolutionary
Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.
BILL HICKS

Chicks Jerk Knows
Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye.
BILL HICKS

Eye Funny Inspirational Paint Spray
I have something to tell you non-smokers that I know for a fact that you don’t know, and I feel it’s my duty to pass on information at all times. Ready?. . . . Non-smokers die every day . . .
BILL HICKS

Evening Information Reality
In Australia…they celebrate Easter the same…by telling our children a giant bunny rabbit…left chocolate eggs in the night
BILL HICKS

Children Easter Night
I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet.
BILL HICKS

Believe Order Purpose
People always snap and think they’re Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they’re Buddha?
BILL HICKS

Jesus People Thinking
[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is…thinking, ‘This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.’
BILL HICKS

Bullshit Comedy Thinking
Rock stars against drugs–that’s what we want, isn’t it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We’re partying now!
BILL HICKS

Approved Party Rocks Stars

I’m not into those kind of rivalries. I remember standing out in front of Stratford, minding my own business. Carload of about eighty kids would pull up.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I’m not into those kind of rivalries. I remember standing out in front of Stratford, minding my own business. Carload of about eighty kids would pull up.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Hicks Quotes