Quotes are for dumb people who can’t think of something intelligent to say on their own.
BO BURNHAMIf Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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Squaring numbers are just like women. If they’re under thirteen, just do them in your head.
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And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.
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There’s a certain line between jokes and music and poetry that’s a bit blurred in my mind.
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Even if he is your friend, never, ever call an Asian person.
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They must have some special kind of cereal!’ My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.
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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.
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I’ve been doin’ drive-bys all of my life. Except the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.
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If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn’t respect that.
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For some comedians it feels so cool to be like: ‘I’ll say anything, man!’. I’m not quite there yet.
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Do you guys like impressions? “Why?” That was Socrates.
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I’m happy with what I’m doing. I try not to focus on how I’ve changed. I just try to focus on what I’m doing now.
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For me, if you distill comedy down, it is surprise and the unexpected. That has to be it on its most base level, in any form.
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I always wanted to be a comedian and actor. I basically stumbled into the music medium, though. I’m OK, but that’s about it. I like to think I’m good enough not to negatively affect the performance.
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I’d really love to make something that doesn’t involve my stupid face.
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I’m a stand up comic and I always sit and slouch, and I got my girlfriend pregnant on my sterile uncles pull-out couch.
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