You know they say money can’t buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile
BOBBY HEENANThe two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they’re allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.
More Bobby Heenan Quotes
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It’s very hard to get out of this hold, that’s why you either have to scoot backwards, move forwards, or try to get up.
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Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire. They’re a lovely twosome, or threesome, or foursome, or twenty-fifthsome.
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I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.
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By the time The Iron Sheik gets to the ring, it will be Wrestlemania 37!
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They’re living proof that the 3 stooges had children.
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This (Paris,France) wouldn’t be a bad place, but it’s full of Frenchmen.
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Its a dog eat dog world, and Mr. Perfect is a Milk Bone.
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When’s the last time you went into a barber shop and saw everyone there unconsious?
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This guy makes coffee nervous.
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There’s nothing better than a good, blind referee.
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If you ever had your moon salted you’d know how painful that could be.
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I asked Stu Hart earlier. I said, ‘Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.’ He said, ‘I have boys?’
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Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain.
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You’re 83? Really? You don’t look it. I would’ve guessed 81 or 82.
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There’s a counter for every hold and a hold for every counter, and a lunch counter for every person that you know Schivone.
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Janetty tried to dive through the window to escape, what an act of cowardice.
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[On Sting] He threw a sucker punch. There’s the sucker who threw the punch. Him the the Bart Simpson hair doo.
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Its amazing that Lou Ferrigno can talk with fifty pounds of cracker in his mouth.
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There’s the downtown area of Tupelo. Did you see the skyscrapers? Two stories.
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There’s only two kinds of music I don’t like….Country and Western.
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Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.
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What are you doing, looking at me with one eye and chasing a fly with the other?
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Hawaii’s the 50th state? I thought it was a suburb of Guam.
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I know all about cheating. I’ve had six very successful marriages.
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The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they’re allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.
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Are there any swamps in Oklahoma? Yes, there is. It’s called Tulsa.
BOBBY HEENAN