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I’m a baby. I sleep like a baby – I’m up every two hours. And I think a lot. I worry a lot. I have great nights of no sleep where ideas come.

Billy Crystal

That’s the thing about jazz: it’s free flowing, it comes from your soul.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Comedy Jazz Soul
Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I’d always go off book and start improvising.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Book Improvising Play School
When we had the girls, my daughter Jenny gave us like a Bible from my daughter of, “Don’t feed them this; don’t feed them that, if she says this, don’t say that,” It was crazy!
BILLY CRYSTAL

Crazy Daughter Girl
I have 40-something intros [that Davis Jr. did]; all are different, none of them happened. And it was hilarious.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Different Happened Something
Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Clothes Differences Looks
There’s only, I think, in life, three things that I do pretty well: Performing, I still can field ground balls, and I make nice kids.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Kids Nice Thinking
Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Comedy Kids Scary
I love doing it [hosting the Oscars] because I love the danger of it and you have to come through and think on your feet.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Comedian Feet Thinking
There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there’s usually only one thing you can do. Go through his clothes and look for loose change.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Big Clothes Difference Mostly
When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Life Realizing Rest Want Your
From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that’s what I had to do.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Ghouls Saws Sids
I started examining history and then everything related to the theater. History, art, all the other studies, if I could link them into the theater, then it became alive for me. It just opened up my eyes.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Eyes History Open Related Started
At 60, I could do the same things I could do at 30, if I could only remember what those things are.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Remember Same Things
Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
BILLY CRYSTAL

News Puck Puff
I’ve always thought that the key to a good sex life is variety. That’s why God gave me two hands. Humans love sex, we need sex, it’s how we connect, it reminds us we’re alive, it’s the third most basic human need, after food and good movie popcorn.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Hands Sex Two
I was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
BILLY CRYSTAL

Father Introducing Kids Producer Years

I’m a baby. I sleep like a baby – I’m up every two hours. And I think a lot. I worry a lot. I have great nights of no sleep where ideas come.

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I’m a baby. I sleep like a baby – I’m up every two hours. And I think a lot. I worry a lot. I have great nights of no sleep where ideas come.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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