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I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.

Bob Saget

My humor was kind of from my dad and all the stuff that we went through, which was a lot of death. My humor was an escape.
BOB SAGET

Dad Escape Humor Kind Study Stuff
I wouldn’t hurt a flea. I’d finger a spider though.
BOB SAGET

Fleas Hurt Spider
Just went to the gym and worked on every body part. Four people slapped me.
BOB SAGET

Body Four People
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET

Gossip People Rumor
My favorite Dylan song? I think it’s ‘Just Like a Woman.’ It always makes me cry.
BOB SAGET

Cry Favorite Song Thinking
Stop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET

Fire Light People
I’m a believer that when one door closes another one opens. But why does the one opening always hit me full-speed-knob-first into my nuts?
BOB SAGET

Doe Doors Nuts
My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
BOB SAGET

Fart Father Stuck
Think well of yourself and others will too. Unless those others are in government, banking, or show business.
BOB SAGET

Banking Government Thinking
Saw a man in Whole Foods yelling at his son, What are you doing?! You know I don’t eat bread!! Is there such a thing as health food abuse?
BOB SAGET

Men Saw Son Yelling
At the end of the day it’s the end of the day.
BOB SAGET

Day End Over Time
I don’t like to drink alone ’cause there’s nobody to fight with.
BOB SAGET

Causes Drink Fighting
If I ever die, I want it to be cause I got hit by a car saving a kid.
BOB SAGET

Car Die Kids Saving Want
I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.
BOB SAGET

Biker Club Kids School
Bob Saget was known, in the comedy clubs in those days, as extremely funny but with dark humor. It was always an inside joke among comics, when he got Full House, it was, like, wow, hes playing this all-American dad kind of thing.
BOB SAGET

Dad Dark House
I’m doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it’s fantastic and it makes me very happy. I’m dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I’m working on a new tv show for cable and it’s not set up yet.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Dirty Nuts Show Shows Television
I love watching people get hit in the crotch. But only if they get back up. If their teeth are bleeding, if they’re really hurt, if an ambulance has to come, I’m not laughing.
BOB SAGET

Hurt Laughing People
What I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone’s ringing a lot more and I’ve got nine lines so when it doesn’t ring, it’s very frustrating.
BOB SAGET

Lines Phones Trying
I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Morning Thinking
I’m psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.
BOB SAGET

Meaningful Myself Physical
Nobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGET

Except Nobody People
I have three kids, the oldest is 18 and her friends are going to see it The Aristocrats because they told her they’re going to see it, especially her guy friends.
BOB SAGET

Aristocracy Guy Kids
Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.
BOB SAGET

Enjoy Masturbation Public
I’m completely changing my diet. My nutritionist recommends I must now stop eating food I have already eliminated.
BOB SAGET

Diets Eating Food
Wise men say, only fools rush in. Wise men are so slow.
BOB SAGET

Fool Men Wise
I have no agenda, nothing to control.
BOB SAGET

Agendas Control Nothing
There are no I’s in we but there are two i’s in Wii.
BOB SAGET

Country People Two Wii

I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.

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I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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