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In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.

Bill Watterson

You have the Swiss Army Knife of mental tools, and it’s going to come in handy all the time.
BILL WATTERSON

Army Handy Knife Swiss Time
That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.
BILL WATTERSON

Problem Science Trying Unimaginable
Everyone knows that! Hobbes: I’m looking it up. Calvin: You do, and I’ll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js! Hobbes: What’s your score for ZQFMGB? Calvin: 957.
BILL WATTERSON

Everyone Knows Letter Played Score Word
Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
BILL WATTERSON

Snow Winning
Now if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
BILL WATTERSON

Craft Different Editorial Joke Taste Technique
My whole problem is that my lips move when I think.
BILL WATTERSON

Lips Moving Thinking
The world of a comic strip ought to be a special place with its own logic and life… I don’t want the issue of Hobbes’s reality settled by a doll manufacturer.
BILL WATTERSON

Issues Reality Special
Calvin: Know what I pray for? Hobbes: What? Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I can’t, and the incapacity to tell the difference.
BILL WATTERSON

Differences Inability Praying Strength
Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.
BILL WATTERSON

Disappointment Friendship Harder Swearing
I was reading about how countless species are being pushed toward extinction by man’s destruction of forests. . . .
BILL WATTERSON

Forest Intelligent Reading Thinking
Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! …Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.
BILL WATTERSON

Enough Undead Zombie
I’m not a vegetarian! I’m a dessertarian!
BILL WATTERSON

Dessert Food Funny Vegetarian
I’m related to people I don’t relate to.
BILL WATTERSON

People Relate Related
So, what’s it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don’t recommend it.
BILL WATTERSON

Graduation Real World
I let my mind wander and it didn’t come back.
BILL WATTERSON

Bumper Funny Mind Sticker Wander
If you can’t win by reason, go for volume.
BILL WATTERSON

Reason Volume Winning

In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.

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Popular Authors

In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Watterson Quotes