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I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.

Ben Elton

Beyond love, beyond unrequited love, perhaps even beyond any other passion known to humanity, deep, deep in the depths of the turgid, clinging, swamplike pit of despair that lies dormant within every soul, lurks JEALOUSY.
BEN ELTON

Jealous Love Lying Unrequited
My parents were secular. I am an atheist.
BEN ELTON

Atheist Parent Secular
I resent the creation of a world in which beauty is a reminder of what we’re losing rather than a celebration of what we have.
BEN ELTON

Celebration Losing World
I loved writing ‘Two Brothers’ more than anything else I have written. It’s the first book I’ve written that I’ve always known I wanted to write. Having said that, it also kept me awake at nights.
BEN ELTON

Book Brother Writing
Kingsley watched her disappear from the room, wondering if his heart would break. Logic informed him that of course it would not. The heart was no more than a muscle, a pump which distributed blood about the body.
BEN ELTON

Blood Heart Men
I don’t know what people who I’ve never met think about me. Some have written horrible things, some have written nice things – but I’m proud of the fact I’ve remained close to everyone I’ve ever worked with.
BEN ELTON

Nice People Thinking
If I did things for the money, I’d have done adverts in the 1980s, when I was hot enough to be offered them, and ‘Police Academy 6,’ which I was asked to write.
BEN ELTON

Hot Police Writing
The Germans are a cruel race. Their operas last for six hours and they have no word for fluffy.
BEN ELTON

Lasts Opera Race
I see dull people as projects … to be reformed
BEN ELTON

Dull People Project
I don’t consider myself Jewish. I am half-Jewish by race but not through my mother.
BEN ELTON

Half Mother Race
I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.
BEN ELTON

Facts Giving Kind
Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I’d never used it. I’m 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.
BEN ELTON

Silly Stupid Wish
I think it is very difficult to legislate for morality.
BEN ELTON

Difficult Morality Thinking
You didn’t wake up, your dreams just changed gear.
BEN ELTON

Dream Gears Wake Up
I did not vote Labour because they’ve heard of Oasis and nobody is going to vote Tory because William Hague has got a baseball cap.
BEN ELTON

Baseball Oasis Vote
You’re mugging old ladies every bit as much if you pinch their pension fund
BEN ELTON

Fund Lady Old Pension

I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.

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I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.

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Popular Authors

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