Not only is my wardrobe totally average, my body’s totally average. I love all the candy-fantasy fulfillment of Sex and the City.
TINA FEYA Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby’s temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who’s boss.
More Tina Fey Quotes
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Every kid has something they’re good at, that you hope they find and gravitate toward.
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In an attempt to make things easier for myself, which is the basis for all of history’s worst decisions […].
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If you ever start to feel good about yourself… …. they have this thing called the internet.
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There are no mistakes only opportunities.
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I’m not that good looking… nobody is that good looking. I have seen a lot of movie stars, and maybe four are amazing looking. The rest have a team of gay guys who make it happen.
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It’s the same reason I don’t get Hooters. Why do we need to enjoy chicken wings and boobies at the same time? Yes, they are a natural and beautiful part of the human experience. And so are boobies. But why at the same time?
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I do like to start on time; I like to set the bar high for people.
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Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
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In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.
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If you want to be a screenwriter, take an acting class to get a sense of what you’re asking actors to do. Learning other skills will help you communicate with people and respect what they do.
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Start with a ‘Yes’, and see where that takes you.
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I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it’s only because I struggle with math.
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Sometimes if you have a difficult decisin to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.
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When a man plays a woman in a dress, you’re halfway there. It’s inherently funny. When a woman plays a man, for whatever reason, it’s not that instant kind of funny.
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It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV.
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According to a new study, women in satisfying marriages are less likely to develop cardiovascular diseases than unmarried women. So don’t worry, lonely women, you’ll be dead soon.
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I want every day to be the most boring news day ever. I want every day to be about spelling bee champions and baby basketball. It’s better to have no comedy material than a horrific news day.
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This weight of embarrassment came over me, and I felt like I was sweating from my spine out. But I realized, ‘Okay, that happened, and I did not die.’ You’ve got to experience failure to understand that you can survive it.
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A Clinical Study. Taking some time to read each night really taught me how to feign narcolepsy when my husband asked me what my “plan” was for taking down the Christmas tree.
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And I can see Russia from my house.
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You’ve got to experience failure to understand that you can survive it.
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Whatever the problem – be part of the solution
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Thomas Jefferson-another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me. This was my problem in a nutshell. To get some play in Charlottesville, you had to be either a Martha Jefferson or a Sally Hemings.
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I feel like there is a lot of inherent humor in the stress and insanity surrounding that process.
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Read! When your baby is finally down for the night, pick up a juicy book like Eat, Pray, Love or Pride and Prejudice or my personal favorite,Understanding Sleep Disorders: Narcolepsy and Apnea.
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If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”
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