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If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”

Tina Fey

To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
TINA FEY

Bridge Bridges Even Guard Overrated Say Seen Troll Witty
‘How do you juggle it all?’ people constantly ask me, with an accusatory look in their eyes. ‘You’re screwing it all up, aren’t you?’ their eyes say.
TINA FEY

Accusatory All Ask Constant Dream Eye Job Juggle Look Mother People
If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way. Then, when you’re in charge, don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.
TINA FEY

Answer Better Energy Ignore Jerky Nove Outpace People Way
Start with a ‘Yes’, and see where that takes you.
TINA FEY

See Start Take Yes You
An acting teacher once told me, ‘Greet everything with yes… Even if you abandon one idea for another one, saying yes allows you to move forward.’
TINA FEY

Acting Everything Motivation Moving Teacher Told Yes
Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.
TINA FEY

Actual Convert Gay People Thinking Witnesses Witty
I can’t possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody’s business and I’ll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life.
TINA FEY

Baby Business Nobody Poisble Regret Ruin Second Take Time Unless Do
I feel like there is a lot of inherent humor in the stress and insanity surrounding that process.
TINA FEY

Children College Humour Insanity Proceed Stress Surround
I think someone should design exercise machines that reward people with sex at the end of their workouts, because people will perform superhuman feats for even the faint hope of that.
TINA FEY

Design Excercise Funny Machine People Reward Sex Someone Workout
Just say yes and you’ll figure it out afterwards.
TINA FEY

Afterward Figures Hate Saying Yes
When a coworker shows me cute pictures of her dog, I struggle to respond correctly, like an autistic person who has been taught to recognize human emotions from flash cards. In short, I am the worst.
TINA FEY

Autistic Coworker Emotion Person Picture Recognize Struggle Taught Worst
Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not.
TINA FEY

Control Course Life Productive Saturday Sometimes Want Witty
I want to thank my parents for somehow raising me to have confidence that is disproportionate with my looks and abilities.
TINA FEY

Confidence Disproportionate Funny Look Parent Raise Thank
It was reported that Guy Ritchie has cast his wife Madonna in a small walk-on role in his new movie, Revolver. Madonna will play the part of the woman who ruins the film.
TINA FEY

Cast Celebrity Country Funny Guy Humor Movie Play Report Role Small Walk Wife Women
Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
TINA FEY

Adorable Baby Blame Creature Fart Humor
Sometimes if you have a difficult decisin to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.
TINA FEY

Answer Difficult Itself Present Sometimes Stail

If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”

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If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”

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