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I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don’t drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren’t speaking and I said I’ll take that drink.

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I was such a dangerous hitter I even got intentional walks during batting practice.
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Son, we’d like to keep you around this season but we’re going to try and win a pennant.
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Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.
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The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It’s that they stay out all night looking for it.
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They told me my services were no longer desired because they wanted to put in a youth program as an advance way of keeping the club going. I’ll never make the mistake of being seventy again.
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Sure I played, did you think I was born at the age of 70 sitting in a dugout trying to manage guys like you?
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There are three things you can do in a baseball game. You can win, or you can lose, or it can rain.
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I was not successful as a ball player, as it was a game of skill.
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They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that ones who drink milkshakes don’t win many ball games.
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Finding good players is easy. Getting them to play as a team is another story.
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You have to go broke three times to learn how to make a living.
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They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What’s funny about that?
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All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you.
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