We always go out looking for live music after our shows.
RON WHITEI’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
More Ron White Quotes
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I’ve asked these guys in rock bands with all the 18-wheelers driving to the venue how they make money. I just don’t understand it. But I don’t understand a lot of things.
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I’m not willing to drag my fans down a road I don’t believe in. That’s just my one little principle. I’ve only got one, and that’s it.
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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
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You can’t fix stupid.
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Movies are boring. It’s like watching paint dry. I did a little role in a movie, and it was eight lines. I was there for three days. It’s just horrible.
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You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
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Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
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If I sit down to write a joke about, whatever, the polluted Gulf of Mexico, it comes out mundane to me.
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I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
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Everybody I know is a joke writer.
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I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
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My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
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The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
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I had the right to remain silent… but I didn’t have the ability.
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My goal is just to become a better comedian.
RON WHITE