Why can’t the English teach their children how to speak?
ALAN JAY LERNERWhy can’t the English teach their children how to speak?
ALAN JAY LERNERWe met at nine We met at eight I was on time No, you were late Ah yes! I remember it well.
ALAN JAY LERNERYou see what happens today. Women act like men and want to be treated like women.
ALAN JAY LERNERMud can make you prisoner and the plains can make you dry.
ALAN JAY LERNERCoughing in the theater is not a respiratory ailment. It is a criticism.
ALAN JAY LERNERAn Englishmans way of speaking absolutely classifies him.
ALAN JAY LERNERPull out the stopper! Let’s have a whopper! / But get me to the church on time!.
ALAN JAY LERNERI could have spread my wings and done a thousand things I’ve never done before.
ALAN JAY LERNERIf you can’t paint in Paris, you’d better give up and marry the boss’s daughter.
ALAN JAY LERNERI’m getting married in the morning! / Ding dong! the bells are gonna chime.
ALAN JAY LERNERThe winter is forbidden till December, And exits March the second on the dot.
ALAN JAY LERNERDon’t let it be forgot, that once there was a spot, for one brief shining moment, that was known as Camelot.
ALAN JAY LERNERPleasure without joy is as hollow as passion without tenderness.
ALAN JAY LERNERBack home everyone said I didn’t have any talent. They might be saying the same thing over here, but it sounds better in French.
ALAN JAY LERNERSnow can burn your eyes but only people make you cry.
ALAN JAY LERNEREternally noble, historically fair; Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat. Why can’t a woman be like that?
ALAN JAY LERNER