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“Trust me, you don’t want to have to actually interact with these people.”

Aisha Tyler

I visualize myself winning the Olympic Pentathlon, inventing a phone that can be controlled by brain waves, or doing the laundry.
AISHA TYLER

Control Doing Inventing Lying Myself Olympic Phone Visualize Wave Win Winning
I really do know football.
AISHA TYLER

Do Football Know Really
I was born in California, raised a vegetarian, and love science fiction, so don’t tell me how I need to be in order to fit your standards.
AISHA TYLER

Country Fiction Fit Love Need Order Raise Science Standard Vegetarian
So I think the longer you do stand-up, the more comfortable you are. You stop wanting to hide your foibles and instead want to show who you are.
AISHA TYLER

Comfortable Foibe Hide Instead Longer Show Stand Think Up Wanting
When I get old and slow down I want to look behind me and see all the fire and the wreckage and no stone left unturned.
AISHA TYLER

Behind Fire Look Old Slow Sown Stone Want
I always tell people that if you really want to know somebody, they should listen to that person’s interview with me. I spend a lot of time with my guests.
AISHA TYLER

Always Guest Interview Know Listen People Person Really Somebody Tell Want
I love it when I come across a word I don’t know. And I would never treat my audience like they weren’t smart enough to come along with me.
AISHA TYLER

Across Audience Come Enough Know Smart Treat Word
I don’t want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.
AISHA TYLER

Pander So Try Want
I’ve always been a gamer, and I had a period where I was gaming at a really hardcore level.
AISHA TYLER

Always Game Gamer Hardcore Level Period
I grew up on the back of a motorcycle – my dad didn’t have a car until I was a teenager. And then my closest friend from grade school was a guy.
AISHA TYLER

Back Car Dad Grade Motorcycle School Teenager
I’m just myself, so I don’t know that I think of myself as a nerd icon.
AISHA TYLER

Icon Know Myself Nerd Thinking
If you haven’t noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and utterly devoid of awesome.
AISHA TYLER

Astronaut Awesome Celebrity Drinking Driver Fun Party People Racecar Suck Unless Working
I spent most of my seventh grade summer dehydrated, green-tongued, and smelling like a Malaysian whorehouse.
AISHA TYLER

Country Dehydrate Grade Green Most Seventh Smelling Spent Summer
I am absolutely a Giants fan and I’m a Dynasty baby so I was a 49ers fan for a long time.
AISHA TYLER

Absolutely Baby Dynasty Fan Giant Long Time
Omnipresence can be a good or bad thing, I suppose. I don’t want to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I’m super-grateful.
AISHA TYLER

Bad Good Grateful Omnipresence Suppose Thing Thinking Want
I like to be nice. I want to be a hero. I want to save people. Or just kill zombies, because they deserve it, because they’re already dead and they can’t feel it. They don’t have feelings.
AISHA TYLER

Deserve Hero Kill Nice People Save Zombie

“Trust me, you don’t want to have to actually interact with these people.”

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“Trust me, you don’t want to have to actually interact with these people.”

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