I talk a lot about women in my act, ’cause let’s face it — if I was hungry, I would talk about food.
ADAM FERRARAOne day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
More Adam Ferrara Quotes
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The human body is in constant change the minute we’re born. It’s in a constant state of decay. We’re all like Ford Escorts, just falling apart.
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I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
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The biggest thing in my life right now is my girlfriend. I love this girl. I know I love her because she told me.
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I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate; humans date.
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My dad was a big car guy. If you wanted to spend time with my dad, he was working on the car.
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I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is ‘If it feels good – stop.’
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One day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
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Sex is important to guys. We need stories to tell our friends.
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I love to believe that there’s one god but there’s many different religions so there’s just the question of which long distance company you pick.
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I don’t think it’s fair – you get married, you give your wife a wedding ring. I think you should give her a mood ring.
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Just to p-s you off, that’s why! I got spoons hidden all over this house! Keep it up, and your napkin rings are gonna start disappearing.’
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I love that magazine, man – Victoria’s Secret – and it comes, like, every three hours.
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Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, ‘How’s it going with that girl?’ ‘One day at a time, man.’
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Whenever she uses the phrase ‘I was thinking…,’ that means I either have to move, paint or buy something.
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There’s no dating in the animal kingdom. No dinner, no movie – just a quick sniff, ‘Alright, let’s go.’
ADAM FERRARA






