The only marriage I’ve observed for any length of time is my parents – 35 years. I asked my pop, I go, ‘Pop, 35 years – what do you hope for?’ He’s like, ‘I hope you die first.’
ADAM FERRARAOne day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
More Adam Ferrara Quotes
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I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
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As soon as you lay down, that’s when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. ‘Goodnight, baby.’ ‘Do you think we were together in a past life?’ ‘Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
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You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don’t let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, ‘Well, why’d you put this spoon in this drawer then?’ ‘
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What if God’s a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I’ll never know why!
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There’s no dating in the animal kingdom. No dinner, no movie – just a quick sniff, ‘Alright, let’s go.’
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I don’t think it’s fair – you get married, you give your wife a wedding ring. I think you should give her a mood ring.
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One day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
ADAM FERRARA -
I know she’s just trying to make things nice, so I do my part. Now, when I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, I turn on the light. I used to just go by sonar: just keep peeing ’til you hear water.
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I love my girlfriend, don’t get me wrong. I truly love this woman, but I have the ability to have sex without any emotional involvement. It’s a gift.
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The girls are beautiful in Hollywood – and enough silicon to caulk a sink.
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My pop is this big, huge man, nothing can hurt him. I went running into his bedroom like, ‘Daddy, Daddy, the boogie man’s under the bed!’ Pop opens one eye, he’s like, ‘Is the boogie man bigger than me?’ ‘
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My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you – I hope she meets somebody nice.
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Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you’re happy, you let us touch you.
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There were many reasons we broke up. There was a religious difference: I’m a Catholic, and she’s the devil.
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I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate; humans date.
ADAM FERRARA