Curious people are interesting people, I wonder why that is.
BILL MAHERLet’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
More Bill Maher Quotes
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If Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?
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I’m for the death penalty, I’m pro-abortion, I’m pro-assisted suicide, I’m pro-regular suicide. Anything that’ll get the traffic moving.
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Only a Bush could answer a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question two different ways and be wrong both times.
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The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.
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People have to stop saying that just because someone is an anti-gay activist they might be gay. They’re DEFINITELY GAY!!
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The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you’ll wind up with a lover.
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We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.
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I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.
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There’s a phrase we live by in America: “In God We Trust”. It’s right there where Jesus would want it: on our money.
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God knows life sucks. It’s right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, “I can’t take away pain and misery because then no one would talk to me.”
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The First Amendment was specifically designed for citizens to insult politicians. Libel laws were written to protect law students speaking out on political issues from getting called whores by Oxycontin addicts.
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Like it or not, we’re still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation.
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Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
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If you want to get rich with a tax free enterprise that sells nothing, start a church.
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When I see the toothless guy, as a liberal, what I say is, ‘I want to help you get teeth.’ Why does that make me an a**hole?
BILL MAHER