“With the amount of money I have, it’s difficult raising children the way I was raised.”

I was raised by a mother who told me I was great every day of my life.

I’m getting older, and it happens. You don’t care as much. I don’t care about too much anymore. I’ve got to think about that a little bit.

When I take my kid to school, all the parents stop and stare.

Alright, remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you.

I don’t know what drives me to succeed. I know I want to always do the best I can. I never was like that as a kid.

Never seen my friends do more push-ups, trying to challenge Cruises’ manhood. It was like, I can be strong, too!

I did rocks, all this dumb stuff. But now it’s just trying to stay afloat and just get through the days.

The only reason I got into stand-up was because my brother told me to. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was 17 and my brother went to a comedy club and he said – you can do that.

Sir one more comment like that and I will strangle you with my microphone wire!

I don’t want to run around with new people. I feel safer with my friends.

I read to my kid, but I can’t stand reading.

Feels good to try, but playing a father, I’m getting a little older. I see now that I’m taking it more serious and I do want that lifestyle.

Sometimes you can’t prioritise family and you feel guilty.

I’ve always just had troubles with my family because I’m psychotic. It had nothing to do with that.

I still like doing stand-up now, but it’s not the same. It used to be that I was out there with five other comedians. Now I usually just do it alone.

Chemistry can be a good and bad thing. Chemistry is good when you make love with it. Chemistry is bad when you make crack with it.

Little children, you are from God, and have conquered them; for the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in this world.

Little children, you are from God, and have conquered them; for the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in this world.

Little children, you are from God, and have conquered them; for the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in this world.

I always wanted my music to influence the life you were living emotionally – with your family, your lover, your wife, and, at a certain point, with your children.

We gotta get out while we’re young, ’cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run.

Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.

The one thing I wished for my children is that they’d be readers.

Having toddlers always means that there’s a fair amount of chaos at home, but that’s part of the fun. And from a work perspective, we have projects under construction all over the world, including many right here in the US.