The only useful thing I ever learned in school was that if you spit on your eraser it erased ink.
DOROTHY PARKEROh, seek, my love, your newer way; I’ll not be left in sorrow. So long as I have yesterday, Go take your damned tomorrow!
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
-
-
Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
DOROTHY PARKER -
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
DOROTHY PARKER -
He is a writer for the ages, the ages of four to eight.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
DOROTHY PARKER -
If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
DOROTHY PARKER -
All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
DOROTHY PARKER -
It was written without fear and without research.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.
DOROTHY PARKER -
It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
DOROTHY PARKER