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Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”

Tim Allen

Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they’re going to respect Mom.
TIM ALLEN

Children Learning Myself Respect
When I went to jail, reality hit so hard that it took my breath away, took my stance away, took my strength away. I was there buck naked, humiliated, sitting in my own crap and urine – this is a metaphor. My ego had run off. Your ego is the biggest coward.
TIM ALLEN

Breathe Coward Ego Hard Prison Reality Strength Yourself
Dogs will eat till they die. Cats will leave food in the dish, incomprehensible to a dog.
TIM ALLEN

Death Dog Food Leaving
If it ain’t broke, you can probably still fix it.
TIM ALLEN

Break Fix Repair Yourself
I love doing logos. I’ve been a graphic artist all my life.
TIM ALLEN

Artist Life Logo Love Myself
I’m a very bad student, but a great learner.
TIM ALLEN

Greatness Learning Myself Student
There is no greater feeling than when a groom turns to see his bride and has tears in his eyes because she is so beautiful.
TIM ALLEN

Beautiful Bride Feeling Greatness Herself
I think there’s a percentage that don’t realize, that don’t know that [standup] is how everything began. We planned it, we work hard, rehearsals to get this. It’s more of a it’s not just coming in there in a T-shirt and holding a microphone.
TIM ALLEN

Beginning Comedy Hard Work Hold Stand Thinking
But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
TIM ALLEN

Human Man Separate Vehicle
I am a thespian trapped in a man’s body.
TIM ALLEN

Body Character Man Myself Trap
For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.
TIM ALLEN

God Ideas Myself Religion Time
The world’s a mean place. It’s unfair, then it’s fair. It’s hateful, then it’s loving. It’s a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels.
TIM ALLEN

Hate Level Lover Place Religious World
In my experience, it’s all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers.
TIM ALLEN

Calm Challenge Experience Father Kind Time
Being wealthy when no one else is, is like being the only one at the party with a drink.
TIM ALLEN

Drink Money Oneself Party Rich Wealth
I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children.
TIM ALLEN

Children Drive License Protection Requirement
Man is the only animal to borrow tools.
TIM ALLEN

Animal Borrow Man Tools

Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”

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Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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