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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.

Ron White

The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another learning disability I can’t even spell. I don’t even have a high school diploma. I’m smart, but you can’t prove it on paper.
RON WHITE

Another Attention Brain Deficit Disability Disorder Information Learn Mean Odd Proces Quite Way
That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
RON WHITE

Beauty Being Help Media Radar Really Star Stay Straight Under
I’ve asked these guys in rock bands with all the 18-wheelers driving to the venue how they make money. I just don’t understand it. But I don’t understand a lot of things.
RON WHITE

Ask Band Guy Monkey Rock Understand Venue
Let’s face it: a lot of my material comes from the stuff that happens to me on the road.
RON WHITE

Come Face Happen Let Lot Material More Road Stuff
I’ve been married a few times. I’m not good at it.
RON WHITE

Few Good Married Time
My favorite bands are the Allman Brothers and Red Hot Chili Peppers.
RON WHITE

Band Brother Chill Favourite Hot People
My opening acts are always really strong because I need a guy who can take on a big, big crowd. Which is not that easy to do.
RON WHITE

Act Always Big Crowd Do Easy Open Strong To
When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
RON WHITE

Back Country Dad Drive Old Range Take Twelve Year
I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
RON WHITE

Cigar Collection Go Great Imply Last Smoke
Think of The Rontourage as the Ron White Channel, where you can see us getting into trouble in all kinds of different places.
RON WHITE

Channel Country Different Get People Place Think Trouble
I still love to walk on stage and make people laugh, and I work very, very hard at it, and I take it seriously.
RON WHITE

Hard Laugh Love Make People Serious Stage Still Take Walk Work
I was desperate for new material, so anything I can write a joke about that works is in the act. No matter who it offends, or who it bothers – doesn’t matter if its something my wife hates.
RON WHITE

Act Anything Bothe R Desperate Joke Material Offend Work Write
I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
RON WHITE

Always Anybody Funny Guy Make Stand Young
There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
RON WHITE

Always Been Century Comic More Other Play Quater Time
I’m set up where I make a lot of money doing stand-up, and it’s easy.
RON WHITE

Lot Make Money Set Stand Up Ways
I had the right to remain silent… but I didn’t have the ability.
RON WHITE

Ability Remain Right Silent

I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.

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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.

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Popular Authors

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