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You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.

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We used to be hunter-gatherers, now we’re shopper-borrowers.
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Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.
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Anything that is not funny at a certain point will be funny.
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I try to make sense of things. Which is why, I guess, I believe in destiny. There must be a reason that I am as I am. There must be.
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You’re best when you’re not in charge. The ego locks the muse.
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As an alcoholic, you will violate your standards quicker than you can lower them.
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A human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.
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No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.
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A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while.
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Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs.
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Gentlemen, haven’t we learned anything from the music of John Lennon? All we need is love.
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