Funny Quotes

I’d rather take coffee than compliments now.

Vegetarians are people who cannot hear tomatos screaming.

Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?

One time, Niall sat on the floor for hours trying to find a way of putting his M&M’s in alphabetical order.

No one sets an impossible beauty standard like ya own mama lmao.

Someday we’ll look back on this and it will all seem funny.

I wasn’t kidding when I said crashed my car on the sidewalk.

You know what they say, dress your best when you go to bed because you don’t know who you’ll see in your dreams.

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.