Billy Connolly Quotes

Billy Connolly
BILLY CONNOLLY

Jesus
The desire to be a politician should bar you for life from ever being one.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Bars Politician
Golf’s really fun in Japan because of the women caddies. … I saw one guy start out playing alone with his caddie.
BOB HOPE

Golf Humorous Saw
Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Allies Soccer
I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word because it makes you think you are useless.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Make Think Useless
I’ve always liked it here. Part of me is Irish. My family comes from the west coast, so whenever I come to Ireland I get a wee tingling in my heart that I’m where I belong.

BILLY CONNOLLY

I’ve always liked it here. Part of me is Irish. My family comes from the west coast, so whenever I come to Ireland I get a wee tingling in my heart that I’m where I belong.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Coast Country Family West
There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Seasons Winter
I’ve always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can’t tell to an audience.

BILLY CONNOLLY

I’ve always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can’t tell to an audience.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Audience Differences Offended You
My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.

BILLY CONNOLLY

My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Parent Pet Zoos
Don’t tell me how to do my job. I don’t come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up.

BILLY CONNOLLY

Don’t tell me how to do my job. I don’t come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Jobs Jon Tell Workplace

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