If life is so meaningless, then why are we always bringing it up?
LILY TOMLINThings are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet?
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Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.
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Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?
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Every day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.
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There’s so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
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Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.
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I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves; I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
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Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.
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Remember we’re all in this alone.
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There will be sex after death, we just won’t be able to feel it.
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You are what you think, geez, that’s frightening.
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The best mind-altering drug is the truth.
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I try to be cynical, but it’s so hard to keep up.
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To me, “sexual freedom” means freedom from having to have sex.
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What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
LILY TOMLIN