Let’s take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.
JOSEPH HELLERWhat do you do when it rains?” The captain answered frankly. “I get wet.
More Joseph Heller Quotes
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There is no disappointment so numbing as someone no better than you achieving more.
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I’m not running away from my responsibilities. I’m running to them. There’s nothing negative about running away to save my life.
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The question is: what is a sane man to do in an insane society?
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What do you do when it rains?” The captain answered frankly. “I get wet.
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Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
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You know, that might be the answer – to act boastfully about something we ought to be ashamed of. That’s a trick that never seems to fail.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
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Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
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I don’t understand the process of imagination-though I know that I am very much at its mercy.
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Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
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In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
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He was going to live forever, or die in the attempt.
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The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren’t paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you.
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When I look up, I see people cashing in. I don’t see heaven or saints or angels. I see people cashing in on every decent impulse and every human tragedy.
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Remember that everyone deserves some fun during working hours.
JOSEPH HELLER